Okay, so I've been watching Glee since the Grilled Cheezus episode back in 2010. I occasionally out-and-out like it, but mostly I watch it because of that train wreck aspect it has. Possibly the stupidest thing about me watching Glee is that I don't actually like the singing/dancing. I don't like most of the song themselves, and a musical performance is like an interruption to my watching Finn be the awkward human meatball that he is and Santana say amazing things. So I wanted to compile a list of my favorite Glee musical performances, because... there really are so few that I like in the first place. The patterns in my preferences will become very clear. 



( Feeling Gleeful? )

Weird things that are indeed fact: 

( Read more... )
Other Cool Things of today: 
I GOT TO WATCH GHOST HUNTERS. YEAH BITCH.
I finished my last hamburger patty. I'm glad I got the giant box of them back in like... August. Now I may never get them again. 
I had a very filling and large lunch at work because I made a salad in advance and had some microwaveable orange chicken, plus some cookies. Awesomecakes. 
I had hiccups after lunch today, but they subsided relatively quickly. 
I managed to get generic waffles instead of ~Eggo.~ Congratulate me; I have never been able to do this before. 
I put all of my "exceptions" at work in the exceptions program on the computer. I don't think I'd ever done this before yesterday, but now I am a wizard. 

 Okay, so I kind of flailed and failed a lot with my "apply for jobs" plan last week. I made a list of 5 jobs I found on Sunday to apply for throughout the week. I apped to a Newswire Editor position in *sigh* Charlotte. I've never even been to Charlotte. It's 4 hours away. When I was driving to Florida and I was 4 hours in, I was like "oh man, I can do this shit - Charlotte's 4 hours from my house; I can do that too!" but thinking of it now and during the last week sort of makes me tired and like a whiny little kid who doesn't want to do chores. 

Found 2 editor-type positions today, one near Raleigh and one actually in J-ville, which is bizarre but happens very very occasionally. They both appear to be very recent ads (about a week old, less than a week), so that's good. Oxford University Press is like a beautiful dream to me, though that's true of various other companies. But OUP is a huge, recognizable name, and I am in love with them, and it has locations outside of fucking New York and Boston. (Okay, not a lot of U.S. locations, and certainly not very good ones, in my opinion. Sorry, New York and Maryland.) Looked for "Snow, Glass, Apples" online today and ended up listening to the reading or ... whatever it's called by Bebe Neuwirth and the Seeing Ear Theatre. Fun times. Well, maybe not "fun," but you know. Also quite a bit creepy with all the, uh, "manhood." 

Thinking about the past and what I could say to people, and if I really want to (hint: I don't), about what they put me through, and thinking about the whole issue of freezing your emotions, operating as if you don't really have any deep ones, when you can live like that and when you can't, and wondering if I taught myself to live like that so well in 2009, and tried to re-ingrain that in myself last summer, that I miss out on some of my own feelings until they punch me in the face. 

This might be really obnoxious because I know he can see this, but -- my boyfriend's pretty frakkin' awesome but I totally blame him for me watching um... this awards show. SERIOUSLY I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE AWARD IS. Is it ... the Oscars? It's still on and everything. Seriously. What is wrong with me today. 

ANYWAY. I just wanted to say to the world that, even though I haven't seen The King's Speech, I was jazzed over and over again tonight because I love Colin Firth and want him to be my celebrity godfather. 

Also WHY ARE THEY PLAYING THE MUSIC FROM OKLAHOMA? And now "Take My Breath Away?" I feel like I'm going mad. WHAT IS THIS MEDLEY FROM HELL. 


( TV & food )

Have in recent months - and every so often over the last I-don't-know-how-many years - been coaxed into thought (from which I slipped myself away, never having enough time to devote the energy I would like to) about two particular concurrent facts of my life: 1) I disassociate myself from religion as much as possible; I feel that the question of "God - yes or no?" is not only wrongly asked but, for my own life, irrelevant.  2) I experience the word "faith" (or "faithful" or ... whatever) as a word that applies to and resonates with my life and my person in a giant way. 

This excerpt - and be thankful that I kept my quoting down to that; I could have run on for pages - describes it (quickly) well. I am a person of - apparently rational - faith. I cannot easily or exactly say what it might be I "have faith in," just that I have faith. It's not something I connect to "something larger than myself;" my experience of faith has been not only spiritual or intellectual, but visceral. 

Lying around in bed since Saturday is making me very rambly, and I want to talk about all sorts of things, like everything Erich Fromm every wrote or suggested, like Epicurean happiness, like the individual as a universe, about living through a human body instead of living in a human body - about not feeling trapped, about the chasm between our personal experience and external "common sense," about using and not using certain words for ourselves - words we think are important or informative but have almost endless gray area - and about the experience of caring. About snow and New England, about how my non-return to New England is no longer a tuck-my-tail-between-my-legs, defeat-y thing. I'll go back someday. I just don't need to go back right now. (There are definitely winter-time advantages to not being in NE, too, but that's the least of things.) 

Also, on my music player, Loreena McKennitt's "Parallel Dreams" album is sandwiched between "Human Nature" by Madonna and "Be Prepared" from the Lion King. I almost feel like I should be proud... 

( TV! )

 Oh my god. My attempts at research are astounding failures when "research" equals "going through lots of old shit from high school." Things I learned: 

- I used to like Family Guy. 
- I listened to Nightwish WAY TOO GODDAMN MUCH. (This is actually relevant to my research.) 
- Loreena McKennitt was basically my patron saint. This has not changed significantly, I suppose. 
- Oh yeah. The Darkness existed. 
- I enjoyed reading The Da Vinci Code. 

I was on the search for a particular song that I used to have (on the old computer that is basically dead now). I remember very little about it. I remember that it had kind of a creepy, slow-ish, sad/dark/cynical maybe sinister feel to it, and that it talked about angels (I believed it had "angel" in the title), and that the band name started with M. Oh, and the vocalist was male. Or... male-sounding. (Never know, okay.) But yeah. A deeper voice. And... it was in English. Besides that, I can pretty much just give my impressions. I always got the idea, listening to it, of a bunch of angels/people in an opium den or something. 

There are multiple "angel" songs that I cannot track down. I remember when I was a youngling creature (like 4, 5) and had two favorite songs - "A Little Less Conversation" (I don't even... why this was a favorite at 5 years old... I don't) and a soft, piano-y angel song with a female vocalist. Several times I remember turning on the radio at night before sleeping, and the first measures of the song would be playing. And I've looked for it occasionally on the internet over the last ... 12 years or so, but I have so little to go on and there are, of course, a thousand billion songs with "angel" in the title. 

So I'm basically spending this evening listening to a bunch of songs called "Angel." SO HELPFUL. :( But I did find this, which I totally would have listened to a thousand times during high school and ... still would now: 

 I watch (500) Days of Summer way more than is probably healthy. 

I have words like "construction" in my head today; "monster" seems to be back lately, though less shouty. 

I love my Ruthi, but she leads me to horrible things that I cannot tear myself away from sometimes, like xtranormal. Here's a result of that -some monotone Doctor Who speculation and my slight hostility toward the Moff and repeating villains way too quickly:

 I always find like a bazillion amazing things on the internet (not including the porn), so this is a post of roughly zero substance to share the best thing that has ever been in my life. (Well, the best 59-second thing in my life, at least.) 




Also, WhoviansUSA returns this week, so I've got to like... come up with an idea for my Friday video tomorrow, because I like being prepared. Because I am Scar. I chase my adorable nephew from the kingdom with family trauma. *Ahem* Why does everything I say turn into a meaningless tangent, exactly? 

I have a lot of shitty ideas about the Girl Friday WhoviansUSA vlogs, and I need to finish watching Destiny of the Daleks because I. STILL. HAVEN'T. I think I only have one more episode to watch, but ... yeah. I like my plan of using the Girl Friday vids as motivation to watch more of the classic series, but it'd be useful if I actually watched an entire story instead of just 4/5s of it or so. But I need more ideas that don't depend on me watching episodes I have never seen before, because apparently I cannot be trusted on such fronts. 

Also, a beautiful out-takes video from the vlogbrothers makes me feel better about life because Hank repeats himself a thousand times just saying "Good morning, John" at the beginning. As a bonus to their necessary editing, John does declare that "Moon Pies are a real thing in the South." Yes. Yes indeed. 

( this is really best hidden under the non-judgmental blanket of the LJ cut. Or... something that makes sense. )

I'm weird-feeling tonight and I need a hug. And then I will promptly fall asleep on whomever gives me a hug because I'm completely zonked. 

A spell that makes everyone in my vicinity and/or anyone who will ever interact in a text-based form with me use the correct "your/you're" because seeing the wrong one makes me feel like I'm under the goddamn Cruciatus Curse. 

Okay, maybe not. I want teleportation, bitches. But it'd be much snazzier if everyone had teleportation powers, because then commutes would... not really exist, plus I wouldn't have to include a footnote on my resume that says "BTW, I have magical powers, yo. Don't worry about me coming in late!" because anybody could work anywhere and live anywhere (else) and it wouldn't need to be explained and result in nobody hiring me ever! :D 

Also, I feel like "I want teleportation, bitches" should be a tag-line for my life, along with "I am the magical sitar." Also "I'm not crazy; I'm just drawn that way." (Though I don't think I've had a "teleportation" status on Facebook in the recent past.) 

[An interesting answer I saw to this question was "a curse to turn people into rabbits," like if the people had been bad or mean or something. This seems a short-sighted "punishment" that... is not much of a punishment, considering the alleged fun bunnies are supposed to have.] 

Today I surprised myself with my own life because I realized that I have known my Ruthi for 7 years! Or something! I don't know; I just remember "November in sophomore year," so who cares about exact dates (except for me because I remember everything that ever happens & memorize everyone's birthday)? But still, it's exciting to me. Now I need you to not dissolve into a puddle of botulism and come back here and have a friendiversary with me, lady. 

Also, apparently my email got mini-hacked? That's what I'm calling it because... I don't know really. It sent a spam thing to me and like, 8 people. I changed my password (at a couple of places) and sent a very awkward email to recipients of the silly spam thing. I don't know if that's necessary, but I thought it'd be good since the thing was sent to my mom's work email and to Renee - whom I did want to write soon, but... not like that - and to several other people I'd like to keep a "sane" impression of me.